Life and 10 things you might be looking for

who what where whenLife is a confusing journey often filled with more questions than answers. It’s like a road with no GPS signal. Some may get hopelessly lost, give in, accept their lot or give up altogether, others face the questions, fears and uncertainties with vigour and valour.

Some of life’s questions will be more important than others, and some will require answers that will make a huge impact on your life. Perhaps what is most poignant, is that only YOU can answer them.

But perhaps that’s the beauty of it. Working it out on your own.

These questions make us wonder, and it’s good to wonder. They keep us searching for better ways, keep us interested and interesting.

Here are 10 of the most likely questions most of us will face at some point in our lives:

  1. What am I going to do with my life? 

The answer to this question may sound patronising but is in fact quite simple. Find what makes you happy.

Find what interests you, something that will set your creativity and imagination ablaze. Once you find it (or feel it) take the next step. Be courageous. Take a leap of faith. It boils down to what you want and what you find interesting and fulfilling because that’s what will bring happiness and excitement into your life.

  1. What would make me feel proud?

People sometimes forget who their lives belong to. Your life is your own, your property. No one else’s. It’s your sole possession and your responsibility to make it, mould it and develop it – continually.

Our lives shouldn’t bend to the wills and whims of others (assuming you are a fully-fledged adult of course) Your life belongs to you alone and you are unique. So I suggest you may choose to take life in the direction that you see fit. As adult’s we don’t need people telling us what to do. We shouldn’t allow insecurity and self-doubt deprive us of what will make us feel proud. Be mindful, try not to let other people influence your decisions because in the end it’s about how you feel about yourself and the life you are living that counts.  If it feels good, really feels good and it feels right…go for it. Make yourself feel proud.

Have you ever heard of an ‘earworm’? It’s when a catchy song or tune runs continually through your mind. And so dear reader allow me to lend you the earworm I have been working with since I began writing this chapter, one that will no doubt be with me for the rest of the day until I want to scream. I hope the lovely Heather Small won’t mind me using it…

 

  1. What am I trying to achieve and why?

Try to identify why you do the work you do. Exclude money – it has to be something more than that. Success occurs when there is a goal and a reason to reach it. Having purposeful goals, feeling motivated, ambitious and having willpower are the only ways to get through the obstacles that present themselves along the road.

When you have a reason for doing something, you have a legitimate purpose behind your efforts. Give yourself a good reason for doing what you do and you will find a way to succeed. I’m not suggesting you hand in your resignation and become a philosopher or philanthropist. I’m simply suggesting that you acknowledge why you do what you do. It’s worth a ponder.

  1. What or who is standing in my way?

I say what or who because very often people stand in their own way. Like a human roadblock. But other than that, things that stand in the way will come in all shapes and sizes. Some will cause bigger headaches than others, but it’s all about how you observe them, how you choose to view them. When you look at obstacles or roadblocks as tests that will lead to you becoming a wiser, better and stronger person, you will flourish.

Sometimes you don’t immediately have or can’t immediately see all the resources you have within you or available to you, but figuring out how to solve a problem or overcome a roadblock is a challenge and with challenge comes opportunity.

Will you find the courage to accept the challenges and take the next step? Some roads have tough terrain, most roads lead to the top. Go beyond your limits and success will meet you there.

  1. How can I move forward?

If you don’t take that first step a path won’t open for you. It’s about creating something from nothing, start with from an idea, a vision and see it through. Be bold, be brave, walk forward never backward. A flash of success, no matter how small, creates the momentum necessary to create even more success.

  1. What are my flaws and faults?

No one is perfect. It’s OK. Identify your weaknesses and then work on turning them into strengths. You don’t have to hide your faults, just blur them. Make your strengths bold and colourful and your idiosyncrasies black and white. If you’re in denial of your flaws you will never work on them. Work on them and feel elated along your path of personal growth.

  1. How can I feel fulfilled and how will I know when I am? 

The most important motivation in life is not to just exist, not to just struggle, but to learn how to create a fulfilling life. A person who is fulfilled is creating positive experiences. A positive experience makes you feel good, is important to you and leaves you feeling optimistic and enthusiastic for more of the same. If you become good at creating fulfilling experiences, your perceptions about life and living quickly shift from pessimistic to optimistic. This emotional shift energises you and motivates you to keep going. Think about a time when you felt good. Really good. Think about it now. Make the feeling bigger, brighter more colourful. Notice where in your body you feel this good feeling. Smile. Plan on how to bring more of it into your life.

  1. Am I holding myself back? 

Refuse to be your own worst enemy. You are in complete control of your decisions and the choices you make. No one can get in your head and juggle things around without your permission. You are in the driving seat, you decide which way to steer the wheel. The first step is to leave worries behind you. Oh dear, another earworm… pack up your troubles in your old kit bag and smile smile smile

old kit bag

Next, drop your grudges. They sap your energy. Open your mind and don’t be stubborn. Next, learn to be patient. Patience is not the ability to wait but the ability to keep a good attitude while waiting. Last and by no means least, perseverance and courage. These two things will get you over, under, around or through anything holding you back.

  1. Am I making the right choices in life? 

This is a good one. Life is about choices and decisions. Choices and decisions create your world and the great thing is, you have the freedom to choose. In your mind every minute of every day you have freedom of choice. You can decide to change your mind, to move forward, backward, to spend money on a new car or a holiday, to buy healthy food or junk food, to go out in the sun or stay in the shade. The question is are you making the right choices in life to get you to wherever it is you want to be? Trust your instinct. We all know right from wrong, what you should be doing and what you shouldn’t be doing. Do what you feel is right rather than what everyone else is doing or thinks you should be doing. Do and decide things based on what is best for you and what will put you in the best position.

  1. What do you love about your life?

Regardless of how many ups, downs and curveballs life throws your way, its’ important to keep things in perspective.  How you respond is key, it defines the strength of your character and ultimately the quality of your life.

I recently bought (and have since bought as gifts) The Daily Greatness Journal – I have nothing whatsoever to do with the company that created them but I’ll include a link for anyone who may be interested https://dailygreatness.co.uk/collections/all/products/dailygreatness-journal

Gratitude can have a powerful impact on your life because it engages your brain in a virtuous cycle. Your brain only has so much power to focus its attention. It can’t focus on positive and negative at the same time. The same way as you can’t feel happy and sad at the same time. And your brain is easily distracted. Gratitude takes practice. Try it. Try writing down something every day that you’re grateful for, something that made you smile or feel good no matter how big or small. A pattern will emerge and if you’re not careful,  you may end up loving quite a bit about your life.

Do what you love and do it often and if you don’t like something, change it!

Gail Marra D.Hyp MNCH (Acc) LAPHP is a GHR registered Clinical Hypnotherapist accredited by the National Council for Hypnotherapy, Association for Professional Hypnosis and Psychotherapy, National Register of Psychotherapists and Counsellors and the Complimentary and Natural Healthcare Council

10 Harley Street, London W1G 9PF      Tel: 020 7873 2051

The Chilston Clinic, Royal Tunbridge Wells TN4 8RA      Tel: 01892 513535

www.hypnotherapyharleystreet.clinic

gailmarrahypnotherapy@gmail.com

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